Long ago I witnessed something that changed my life: I saw someone fall head over heals for someone else, probably due to competitive nature and what I cannot not understand as pure good looks and character.

A good friend of mine had the opportunity to get together with a stunning woman, but could not see it working out.

What I remember and what stayed with me was the state the woman was in. Completely yielding and giving it her all to get this man. It instilled a longing in me – that I might do that to a woman one day.

I have my hang ups, the world often offers you something that you should take and my taste is greater than what I can muster into being – but dreaming of it is beautiful, and if I could do that for at least some days, I’d be a happy man.

There are moments of intense love I imagine – that embody the word to such extent that it conjures up words like electric and unfathomable. Visible infatuation I like to picture. Exclamations of disbelief at how mind blowing I want the experience to be when we connect on deeper levels.

Enjoying the same music, spontaneously dancing or at least bobbing heads to the rhythm. Philosophical agreement and complementation of styles – playing into each others hands naturally and with endearment.

Finally being able to kiss her every time we meet, playing games of who cares the most and who gets the other the most tailored to soul gifts. This art of loving is what I want so badly…

I want to make fun of all the cliché’s in the world and do them with joy in my face – be naïve, be grumpy and let her put a smile on my visage, make her coffee when she’s working – I want her to help me get me over smoking too much.

Just sort of live together, but with passion for the small and big things, but laugh at the big things because they are easy for us. ‘Without effort’ – from a film called wristcutters_a love story.

The odds are it wont happen these ways, but I’m attempting to paint a picture of harmony. Yet is this not a typical dream? Shallow, ordinary, theatrically overdone and the rest of all the doubts all serve to never achieve something like this. And that’s part of what I’m getting at – living love in your comforting way is not new in general but it would be new to any individual experiencing it.

The blood pumping through arteries, heart pounding and doing all of it effortlessly…Now effortlessly is loosely used because I do want there to be effort, but its different when you do something you love. There is not that taint of ‘I must do this against my will’ – completely the opposite: it invokes passion and creativity that culminate in a fluent movement that becomes something like a dance.

At this point my words fail and my heart and imagination take over – so I would have to direct short films to explain what I mean. I would like to travel into that parallel universe where this is happening and film a few minutes.

The funniest thing is: I don’t think I wont achieve something like this in my life…